A Web Worker’s December Twenty-Fourth

‘Twas the night before Christmas, and in my workspace,
The tech gear was taking breaks from the rat race.
The smartphones were plugged into USB,
And the laptops were waiting for “press any key.”
The servers were nestled with heads in the cloud,
And a few FTP files were being allowed.
So I started to close Twitter, Facebook and Gist,
‘Cause tomorrow, I thought, the news could be missed.
When from the dark screens there rose such a ruckus,
I jumped to my desk to see what overtook us.
The normally placid display on my Evo
Was flashing and shining a red-and-white glow.
The light was so bright I could almost not see,
But it looked like a video window to me.
And from the speaker there came such a sound,
Saying “Can you hear me?” in a voice big and round.
“Cell service is bad at the North Pole, you know,
But I wanted to call you on Skype ere I go;
To get on the sleigh,” said he, sounding merry;
“I’ve got more calls coming in on my BlackBerry (s rimm).
The season is great now the ‘Net works all right;
I have the elves tweeting; Rudolf runs my website.
I can check Google Tasks (s goog) while I’m up in the air;
And I’m mayor of my own domain on Foursquare.
I’ve outsourced most packages to Amazon (s amzn),
And UPS (s ups) delivers for me by the ton;
But there are some things I must still do myself,
There are just a few presents can’t be left to an elf.
Some gifts just won’t fit stockings hung on the hearth;
It’s tough to find packages for Peace on Earth,
And I pay large-box charges on Goodwill to All,
And Joy to the World can’t be found at a mall.
Meanwhile, though, can you do me a favor,
I’ll thank you for being such a good neighbor.
Please pass on the word to your friends at the blog:
Tell them for me to have an eggnog.
Say thank you to Simon, to Scott B. and Amber,
Pamela, Dawn, Thursday, Darrell; remember
Celine and Aliza, and don’t forget Om;
And pass on my thanks to the readers at home.”
He raised eyes to webcam, or maybe to heaven,
And said, “Wish them good cheer in twenty-eleven,
But now, tell them all to relax and sleep tight:
Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!”

Image courtesy of Flickr user SolYoung

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