The guy from Apple’s (s aapl) “There’s an App for That” series of commercials does a fine, upstanding job, don’t get me wrong. He’s a credit to his profession, in fact, and has become iconically associated with one of the most successful products ever released. But he’s seriously ruining Christmas.
A new Apple ad in the series features an app-centric take on the classic “12 Days of Christmas” holiday carol, as rendered with uncompromising unmusicality by the voice that smugly informs us about everything there’s an app for. The apps don’t correspond to the actual items described in the original tune, but instead highlight various holiday-time activities.
Here’s how it breaks down (all links direct to iTunes):
- 12 Cookies Cooking – The Betty Crocker Mobile Cookbook (free)
- 11 Cards A Sending – Postman ($2.99)
- 10 Gifts for Giving – My Christmas Gift List ($0.99)
- 9 Songs for Singing – TabToolkit ($9.99)
- 8 Bells for Ringing – Holiday Bells ($0.99)
- 7 Slopes A Skiing – Snow Reports ($1.99)
- 6 Games for Playing – Christmas Fever ($0.99)
- 5 Gold Rings – Anna Sheffield Jewelry (free)
- 4 Hot Lattes – myStarbucks (free)
- 3 Flights Home – Flight Search (free)
- 2 Feet of Snow – Weather Pro ($3.99)
- And an app that can light up the tree – Schlage LINK (free, but requires additional hardware)
So all told, that’s $22 for a complete holiday. Is it worth it? Probably not. Actually definitely not. Trust someone who has a whole heap of Christmas-themed apps cluttering up his iTunes library from last year, when the novelty of the device was enough to get me to pay good money for a virtual fireplace I could carry around in my pocket. That said, I wouldn’t object to some gifted apps turning up in my virtual stocking Christmas morning.