The circle of life sculpture in Vigeland Park, Oslo
It didn’t came on a piece of paper. It was more like a series of disjointed scenes from a movie reel lying on the floor, waiting to be clipped together. It didn’t come as a revelation; instead it came as itself: life.
Like many San Francisco days, it started out gray, wet and cold, enveloped in fog that makes you apprehensive. And like many California days, it ended in bright sunshine, and blue skies with warm wind that caresses the skin.
I started my uniquely American day at a Jewish Temple in Palo Alto, celebrating the life of my friends Saar and Patty’s baby boy. It ended with the memorial service of my friend Rajeev Motwani, a famed academic and venture investor, but most importantly a great human being, in a church on the Stanford University campus. It started with tears of joy and it ended with a quiet tear of sorrow.
And that’s just it — Friday turned out to be metaphor for life. If one event bookended the start of the journey, then the other simply highlighted the destination. And in the process it taught me that it is how we live that is really important.
Saar’s boy has his entire life ahead of him, just like a blank page, only to be filled by the ink of time. Rajeev’s life is like a great novel that has come to an end, filled with stories. I sat in the back of the church and heard a lot of Rajeev’s friends, family members and business colleagues tell stories about him at a heavily attended memorial service that included everyone from his current students to random strangers to two of his most famous students, Larry and Sergey. (Google has endowed a chair in Stanford’s computer science department in Rajeev’s name with a $2.5 million donation.)
Someone called him a great connector, others called him a brilliant mind. But to me, he was just a quiet, thoughtful, kind man, who spoke not with his words but with his actions. He communicated with a smile, and not with a frown. It was not who he was or what he did, but it was how he did it that will remain with me forever.
Of the many who spoke at the memorial, it was Lakshmi Pratury who put it best when she said (and I paraphrase) that in our life we spend too much time agonizing over things related to work, almost forgetting to celebrate and savor the little, countless moments of joy and happiness. And that’s what life is all about. She reminded us that Rajeev used to enjoy those countless moments. The little joys. Perhaps we should, too. (Share you memories about Rajeev at http://rememberingrajeev.com.)
Last night, when I had difficulty falling asleep after my long and emotional day, I decided to watch the season debut of “House.” In the episode, Dr. Greg House, my favorite malcontent (after me, obviously), when asked why he obsesses on failures so much, says, “Successes only last till someone screws them up; failures are forever.” I guess we’ve all thought about life in those terms. I know I did before my own brush with mortality.
Later in the same episode another character, Lydia, remarks: “Everything ends. Life ends. That doesn’t mean we can’t enjoy the beginning.”
To Rajeev, good-bye till we meet again. To my friend Saar’s boy, welcome.
Photo Courtesy: The circle of life sculpture in Vigeland Park, Oslo by Quistnix via Flickr
Om, all one can say is very well said.
Thanks Om.
I hope you focus on your family and friends today and enjoy this weekend and not obsess about ribbit.
This was very profound, and very beautiful. Quite inspiring.
Good judgement comes from experience. Experience comes from bad judgement.
Well said, Om.
Staying grounded in what’s amazing about right now is important and challenging, especially when a big part of what makes our work so engaging is excitement and optimism about the future. There’s richness in both, the trick is creating a balance — to savor today and look forward to the future, in appropriate measure.
JB it is much harder to do in reality – finding that balance. I have often struggled with one or the other. I think in the end the sooner we find this balance, the better it is.
Disclaimer: I swear I am not some crazy hippie!
One thing that’s helped me is thinking of the finding of the balance as a practice, rather than a finite solution. To be looking for it at all means your tending to its creation.
It’s so VERY easy to get distracted, whether it’s because you’re so consumed with the day-to-day or you’re future-tripping has creeped upwards and whoops, suddenly it’s eating up 99% of your headspace. It’s also easy to get frustrated, since we’re usually failing, at least a little, which makes it tempting to give up trying at all.
Maybe we’ll never find the perfect balance, but we can enjoy and appreciate being mindful of trying to get there? I guess I do sound like a crazy hippie, huh?
Inspiring and exceptionally well put. Life is meant to be lived, and you’ve encapsulated that idea brilliantly.
INSIGNIFICANCE OF WORK
Fantastic post and thanks for putting things in perspective. We, especially readers of Gigaom, startup-types, Silicon Valley types etc. frequently forget the most important things in life. Thank you for reminding us that living life and appreciating the little things is far more important than obsessing about work.
Well said Om.
Always something that we need to remind each other.
This post was one of those little moments.
I am in bed holding my one-week old son, Ryan and appreciated this post very much. I wanted to get to both of these events but life intervened. Om, everyone I meet who knows you (one of Om’s best friends was in the hospital having a baby while we were there) always speaks so highly of you. Thanks for being a good role model and let’s get together soon. How about this week?
Robert, only if you promise to bring the photos of RSS. :-)
Seriously, we could meet Tuesday or any other day.
And thank you for your kind words. Sentiments are mutual. I look forward to seeing you,
Cheers
Thanks for being a good role model.
+1
Thanks for the beautiful post and perspective. We often don’t take time to smell the roses and to appreciate all of the special people in our lives. Feeling very lucky and blessed to have you as a friend.